Thursday, March 13, 2008

T-A-K-E-N-O-P-R-I-S-O-N-E-R-S

Rap Video Recipe:

Ingredients:
1 artist or band

$200,000.00 in fake money

175 lbs. of shiny objects

15 scantily clad women

1 nightclub. If unable to rent a nightclub simply use a city setting. If you live in the southern US simply use a backyard with a large number of cohorts dancing at a cookout, dogfight or just a rusted out Cadillac with no doors.

30 seconds to 1 minute of footage displaying the poor conditions of your living situation (where you used to live before you done came up and did it up big).

Process:

In a medium to large nightclub add and mix the artists, the women and shiny objects. Let song play for about one minute then drop the fake currency directly upon the night club.
Halfway through baking add the footage of desolate conditions including a large number of shots of the under underprivileged youth and elderly. Cut back to the nightclub scene and fade out with a solo shot of the artist.

A good recipe but the end result taste like Rick Ross' beard.



Every once in awhile I stumble across a video that just makes me think..."Damn...wish I had thought of that." which is often followed by..."Damn...wish I made music videos." and finally concluded with...."Damn...wish I had a job". Shank Nelpin of Golliblogs fame put me on to this Aesop Rock video which is just flat out cool. Grade A lyrics meet grade B horror movies...a match made in zombie heaven. Leave it to indie artists to surpass their mainstream counterparts in almost every factor. Half naked women are no substitute for imagination. Their presence is always appreciated however.


Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Goodnight sweet Prince


First he helps me win my fantasy baseball league and now this. Prince Fielder has joined the Overweight Black Male Vegetarians Club (currently at 2 members). Much like his father Cecil Fielder, Prince is known not only for his bat, but his belly as well. 5'11 260 lbs. Prince is a monster in the diamond, slugging his way to a franchise record 50 taters (home runs) last year for the Milwaukee Brewers, making him the youngest to do so in MLB history. During the off season, he was given the book "Skinny Bitch" by his wife (who is veggie along with their daughter) and for the last several weeks he has cut meat out of his diet.

As founder and long time sole member of Overweight Black Male Vegetarians Club, I'm happy the welcome Mr. Fielder to the group. I've been a Prince fan for awhile and I'm glad he is spreading the word through his actions. Vegetarian athletes are few and far between, as the diet is seen as counterproductive to many competitors. When a guy like Fielder makes the switch it does more to change perception and attitudes that a year's worth of PETA ads. Now all I need is a ticket to Milwaukee and a Soy dog costume..



One more point. UFC fighter and Ultimate Fighter winner Mac Danzig should also be credited for helping reposition vegetarianism. The vegan is one of the most exciting and interesting young fighters in the lightweight division and proof that not only pansies and commies care about animals.